MAGA: Make America Grift Again
So Trump was going to make America great again. Fantastic. We were supposed to be swimming in prosperity — gold-plated jobs, filet mignon at Walmart prices, and, I don’t know, maybe a bald eagle delivering paychecks straight to the trailer park. Instead, what did we get? Grocery bills that make you sweat like you’re betting the rent at the casino, and a town council in Payson whose idea of infrastructure is duct tape and a prayer.
The Pool of Broken Dreams
Let’s talk about the pool. Our town doesn’t have one. Zero. Nada. The kids are doing cannonballs into potholes because the old pool is closed. What’s the Trump-inspired solution from our local Three Stooges on the council? “Hey, why not slap some duct tape on the shut-down pool and call it good?” Because nothing says fiscal responsibility like turning a public safety hazard into a Slip ’N Slide of tetanus.
MAGA Math: Broke + Broke = Rich
Remember the prosperity Trump promised? Well, apparently it skipped Payson. The trailer park crowd still can’t afford groceries, but hey, they’ve got hats! Nothing screams “economic boom” like standing in line at the Dollar Store wondering if you can stretch instant ramen into a three-course meal. MAGA prosperity is kind of like Bigfoot — lots of people claim to have seen it, but the evidence looks suspiciously like a guy in a costume.
Same Old Circus, New Red Hats
This is the magic of Trumpism: convince people that “great” is just the same old broke life, only now you chant while you suffer. The prices go up, the services go down, but don’t worry — somewhere, a billionaire just got another tax cut. And here at home, the Stooges are busy following the script: obstruct, complain, and do absolutely nothing that would actually help anyone.
So, congratulations, folks. Payson is officially MAGA-great. No pool, higher prices, and a future being held together with duct tape. If that’s winning, please tell me what losing looks like.
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